LOW EXPECTATIONS

d-structive:

missdrarrydawn:

gaslightgallows:

erdsthenerds:

ultramarineblues:

sparklinganxiety:

patrickdiomedes:

graceking:

I love these comics by Nathan W. Pyle.

Here are some more good ones

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LET ME ABS O R B

@diseonfire here have some more

Perhaps I prefer fewer revolutions and more minerals is a mood

We own things but have hidden them.

REQUEST MUTUAL LIMB ENCLOSURE

Imagine pleasant nonsenses.

the-void-machine-system:

dzamie:

luisonte:

One punch man

THE FLOURISH AND SHEATHE

As a professional swordsman should

studentofetherium:

studentofetherium:

sometimes, the only way i know my roommate is still alive is the $30 cheese that appears and disappears from our fridge

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the reviews are in

handmed0wnart:

jonathanssweatercollection:

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loving the lord of the rings so far

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everythingfox:

Snake or spider kitty?

fireball-me:

hiddenramen:

one of my greatest pet peeves in fiction, and it is truly stupid I know, is that no one seems to understand how genuinely hard it is to kill someone via stabbing. stab wounds have a mortality rate of like 5%. especially abdominal stabbing. tv shows and movies show dudes getting stabbed one time in the lower abdomen with a tiny knife and then they fall over. like what did he die of precisely. that man died of Small Knife

the knife was discreetly laced with a point blank gunshot to the head

dungeon-meshi-tournament:

The Touden party from Dungeon Meshi wearing their frog suitsALT
Senshi from Dungeon Meshi with his cooking equipmentALT

Favourite Anything from the Series Tournament, Bracket 1 Round 2 Part 2

Frog suits

Senshi’s cooking equipment

Masterpost

gallusrostromegalus:

theodorepython:

gallusrostromegalus:

So one of my neighbors has a lawn Roomba or whatever they’re called, and this thing trundles around looking like a background robot in the background of the original trilogy, and ABSOLUTELY BAFFLING THE DOGS.

They have concluded, I think, that it’s some kind of prey animal because right after this video ended they decided to crouch down and stalk it, which means I’m 90% sure I’m going to have to stop Arwen from eating it at some point.

Of course it’s a prey animal it fucking eats GRASS

While I can’t fault your reasoning on robot taxonomy, apparently we’re both wrong:  Arwen, as much as she is a high-prey-drive animal, is foremost, a herding dog, and has decided that the Lawn Roomba is a SHEEP.

What happened is the lawn roomba belongs to the guy that does most of the maintainence on the neighborhood park, and he had it out grazing on a different section of lawn when my parents came down for a walk and Arwen was siezed by 200 years worth fo Kelpie Instincts, rolled out of her Harness and proceded to herd the shit out of this tiny, oblivious robot.  

Everything was on display- mock-stalking, intimidating eye contact, barking, running in front of it to try to get it to balk, the scariest barking she can muster (which is actually.  pretty scary if you’re not used to Loud Dogs), looking back at my parents for directions.  or rather, looking at my Mom while Dad tried unsuccessuflly to capture her.

After about ten minutes they realized she wasn’t biting it, and decided to let her play Sheep Simulator 5000 for a while. She eventually figured out that 

  • It  doesn’t respond to Yelling, Posturing or Aggressive Eye Contact
  • It does respond to having it’s wheels or bump hazards hit 
  • It would respond to its side being nosed or slapped by moving in a different direction

Conent that this was apparently some kind of blind, deaf and particularly stupid sheep, she could now manage the robot by smacking it if it got too close to the creek bed or fence for her liking, and was eventually content to sit on the highest point of the field and Supervise ™ it.

“Hey.” Said Roger, owner of the robot. “Do you think if I put the ramp down she’ll herd it into the back of my pickup?”

Arwen was mostly asleep in the afternoon sun as roger put the ramp down but woke right up when mom Whistled, then pointed at the truck.  She immediately went after the robot and did something that wouldn’t have occured to me, an allegedly more intelligent being: the robot is roughly triangular, and when it hits an obstacle, will change direction so that one of its other sides (rather than points) is now the ‘front’.  So to get it to move in a straight line in the direction she wanted, Arwen would smack the two sides of the robot that she didn’t want it to go in in quick sucession, and got it across the field, over a small hill and up the ramp as fast as it’s clumsy little wheels could go.

“I didn’t know you had a fully-trained sheepdog!” Said Roger

“Me either.” said Mom.

So Arwen now has a Semi-Weekly Appointment to play with Sheepbot.

everythingfox:

The bed ate the cat